Monthly Archives: September 2014

Yelp Review Humor


Yelp review humor seemed like a great idea after stumbling into comical and somewhat ludicrous  Yelp Reviews for Aliso Beach.  I thought it would be fun to share some yelp review humor.  The number of responses from people living miles from this South Laguna Beach and destination confirms my belief that the popularity of this beach has grown tremendously.  Remember, this is the only beach in Laguna with a parking lot on the coastal side, additional parking on the inland side of South Coast Highway, and  free spots along the incline of the street heading south! It is a desirable beach to visit.

This was the first time that I really took notice of ratings for beaches.  It just so happened I ran into the review of Aliso Beach and I have some funny responses to the Yelp Reviews coming as far away as Las Vegas, Nevada.  I have picked the reviews to respond to in no particular order and I hope you enjoy Aliso Beach Yelp Review Humor for things said about Aliso that I felt clearly did not capture the essence of this wonderful Laguna Beach!


Aliso Beach Humor Yelp Review 1

Review number 1 has a beach goer complaining that the public restrooms weren’t clean and so she recommends wearing shoes!

My Response:  Doesn’t the term public restroom tell you all that you need to know about a restroom? For that matter I would not recommend anyone forget to wear shoes in a public restroom and I would not isolate this problem to Aliso Beach.  On the record, I will say that I have seen worse than Aliso Beach and  have found those restrooms to generally be without issues and clean.  There is a staff there on premise every day, and they work their tails off to keep the beach and facilities super clean.  I appreciate them!

Aliso Beach Humor Yelp Review 2

Review number 2 is from the same person rating the beach above.  The reviewer said that they had heard there was a shower but could not find it.

My Response:  Given the size of Aliso Beach and the close proximity to the bathrooms which drew a negative response from this Yelp Reviewer, it is hard to imagine not finding the shower.  I will say that it is possible this person may have visited the beach after Hurricane Marie tried to make Aliso Beach the new Atlantis with massive and powerful waves eating up the beach, fire pits, sidewalk and planter on the south end of the beach.  The shower now happens to sit in an area of the beach roped off due to damage from the Hurricane Marie driven waves.  Although the shower is sorely missed, I will not be blaming Aliso Beach or the County for it’s loss.  I am hoping that seasonal transition from Summer to Winter this fall gives the beach an opportunity to naturally restore itself and gives the County a chance to make some repairs.  

Aliso Beach Humor Yelp Review 3

Review number 3 indicates that she has been knocked down by big waves several times and has been embarrassingly been face planted into the sand on those occasions.

My Response:  Silly Goose!  Never turn your back on the ocean because Aliso Beach will smack you down if you are not paying attention.  If it took several times to discover that letting your guard down with the waves at Aliso Beach produces the embarrassment of being throw face first into the sand in front of your friends and the rest of the public enjoying the beach, then perhaps you did not learn your lesson!  Waves at Aliso Beach are of a shore break variety with a steep sloping beach and waves thundering the shoreline year round.  Never turn your back to the waves at Aliso Beach.  The penalty for not following this advice could be a far graver result.  By they way, checking a marine and surf report for days at Aliso Beach where the waves are 2 feet and under is a very easy thing to do!

Aliso Beach Humor Yelp Review 4

Aliso Beach is not a good place for swimmers.

My Response:  Stop being so negative!  The ocean does not pump out waves every day of the calendar year.  Therefore to say that Aliso Beach is not good for swimming or is never good for swimming is an abuse of logic.  Aliso Beach does get some intimidating waves that crash right on the shore and I am not surprised to see these responses from beach visitors from inland who have not grown up in or trained in these kind of waves.  There is a bigger problem here for people coming from a long ways away when it comes to wanting to swim at the beach.  You have to study the marine reports.  This website, thanks to Solspot, has a surf report that will tell you when the waves are bigger. It is a good policy to check the reports before making plans for the beach.  Just this summer I had to tell a family that the beach was all chewed up, rocky and dangerous for kids on that day.  Checking the marine reports would alleviate the disappointment of your children and anyone else in your party that had their hearts set on swimming.

Aliso Beach Humor Yelp Review 5

The trash is overflowing and obnoxious bees frequent the trash can and snack bar areas.

 There has been a lot of buzz around Aliso Beach this summer and it isn’t just the fact that Hurricane Waves have torn the beach up and caused a lot of damage. My first thought is given the loss of bees and the mysterious colony collapse disorder which threatens the insect most responsible for our blooming and food bearing plants, the presence of bees is a good thing.  While I respect the role bees play in food, I, like you, do not want to be on the wrong side of a stinger when I throw trash away hope to get them to buzz off.  It is a little obnoxious and I would be concerned too if allergic to bees. As for the trash cans always overflowing, I am going to chalk that up as a busy day at the beach and a rare occurrence. Maintenance at this beach is consistent and timely so I stand by my statement that the County of Orange does a great job keeping Aliso Beach nice!

Aliso Beach Humor Yelp Review 6

The lifeguards at Aliso Beach are the hardest working and nicest lifeguards.

My Response:  I could not agree with you anymore.  Lifeguards at Aliso Beach while rumored to be significantly underpaid, have a great attitude and take tremendous pride in what they do.  As a wave rider and someone that has visited Aliso Beach 100’s of times over the years, I respect the job they do and recognize their significant role in protecting human beings in variable and sometimes life threatening ocean conditions.  I will say that lifeguards are human beings and they are probably friendlier than people give them credit for if you reach out to them.  At Aliso Beach, they are exceptional at educating people on current conditions and keep people safe.  They honor their code to preserve human life and the water at Aliso Beach can be really dangerous!

Well, that is it for now.  Hopefully you enjoyed Aliso Beach Humor for Yelp Reviews!

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New Aliso Beach Phone Cases


New Aliso Beach Phone Case, Aliso Beach Phone Case, Aliso Beach IPhone Case,

Aliso Beach IPhone Case

A couple of weeks ago we got a request for new Aliso Beach Phone Cases courtesy of Scotty Carter that we had never printed for.  Printing is both fun and addicting and I suppose that it will never get old.  This particular order came from the East Coast.  The cool thing is that the order isn’t coming from the surf photography and wave riding community in Orange County, California where everyone is cannibalizing each other’s businesses.  Given that everyone is enjoying wave photography out here and trying to make a run at legitimizing the work as a business, it is refreshing to see someone not connected in any way to the Southern California surf scene reach out and say those are beautiful and please send me some.  Needless to say I will be very happy when these new Aliso Beach Phone Cases leave for the Pennsylvania today.

The images chosen weren’t any images we had tried before.  Truthfully, I always expect Scotty Carter’s work to translate well because it always does with how hard he works to present Aliso Beach in its finest light and how much attention to detail he brings in the preparing to print process.

There are two new Aliso Beach Phone Cases.  The first one is called Divine Light and the second is called Green Back!  If you love Aliso Beach and you are aware of the damage at this beach as a result of high surf driven by Hurricane Marie, these new Aliso Beach phone cases might just be a better way to remember one of your favorite Laguna Beaches.

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Aliso Beach Post Hurricane Marie Needs A Break From High Surf

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Not to minimize in any way the seriousness of the crime of murder but post Hurricane Marie, Aliso Beach has more yellow caution tape than a Crime Scene Investigation Miami episode.  The yellow tape is roping off dangerous and unstable areas where severe beach erosion has caused a sidewalk to buckle and near collapse and exposed rocks all over the beach where there once was sand.  In the nearly 30 years I have ridden waves at Aliso Beach, I have never seen the kind of beach damage evident today.  Half the parking lot is still closed with a boat load of sand reaching the parking lot with each combination of above normal waves and higher tides.  I don’t know what the plan is to fix the damage that exists at Aliso Beach post Hurricane Marie, but I do know that she has a way to go before things normalize and that County and City officials will have some serious thinking to do about how to fix this damage.  I would imagine that lost parking lot revenue will be just one of the many pressing reasons to put this beach back together.  This morning, county workers were wrapping up trees, barriers and light posts to keep people out of the areas falling apart from the damage.  It is no joke.

Here are more photographs from Aliso Beach Most Hurricane Marie.  Aliso Beach needs a break from high surf and high tides to recover and give the County of Orange the opportunity to think about the extent of the damage and make moves to put back together a valuable asset and revenue producer for the county and city of Laguna Beach.




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Aliso Beach Before And After Marie


I would like to personally thank Professional Photographer Kirk Keiser for the photographs used in this piece. Photographs used for this story are the sole copyright of Kirk Keiser.  Thank you Kirk for the shots!  From Kirk’s lens, we are able to see the dramatic changes to Aliso Beach and Aliso Beach before and after Marie.

If you are fan of Aliso Beach and have a visual in your mind as to what Aliso Beach looks like, you may be shocked at the devastation to the beach post Hurricane Marie.  The erosion at Aliso is unbelievable and with another large swell from New Zealand coming and Hurricane Norbert sending waves on its heels with significant tropical swell, Aliso Beach needs a break.  The small gallery below is Aliso Beach the day before the arrival of waves from Hurricane Marie.  The gallery below is to give you a frame of reference as to how the beach was before the large waves and how it is after the large waves.  You might be surprised at the beating Aliso Beach took.


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WARNING:  The gallery you are about to view maybe upsetting.  Viewer discretion is advised.

Quite frankly, Aliso Beach is tore up and it is about to get another dose of back to back Southwest and Southeast Swells with higher tides that will do nothing for the recovery of Aliso Beach.  The Aliso Beach you knew is gone and it remains to be seen as to how long it will take to put herself back together….if even possible.  Mother Nature is a powerful, powerful force, and Hurricane Marie reminds us of this fact!



Some of the most notable damage from Hurricane Marie includes the loss of sand, exposure of rocks used to build the beach up, the reappearance of old round fire rings buried in sand long ago, the loss of one of the current square fire rings to the waves and the exposure of old jagged pier pilings with rebar wire sticking out from them.  It makes you wonder how and when Aliso Beach will return to normal.  Nature has a mysterious way of moving sand back and it is possible that despite the huge differences between Aliso Beach before and after Marie, it would not be unheard of to see a natural restoration take place.  I for one, never bet against nature.  It might just take a little while longer than typical.

Posted in Aliso Beach, Aliso Beach Events, Aliso Beach News, Aliso Beach Surf, South Laguna Beach News Tagged , , , |

Aliso Beach Today Lost A Little More Pier


Aliso Beach today lost a little more pier than it had when it was first taken down. I was talking with wave rider and photographer Stan Moniz over Facebook and he told me that there was heavy equipment down there to remove the recently exposed pier pilings.  Wave damage from Hurricane Marie had done quite a number on the beach exposing an incomplete job of removing the pier.  According to Brennan Clarke, a notable big wave surfer that frequents Aliso Beach when the waves are heavy, told me that there was a Bob Cat and some sort of small crane there to do the job.  Stan thought that they may have also brought sand to replenish the beach but a lifeguard this afternoon indicated that the sand was starting to come back to the beach.

I know a little bit about the pier story.  I know that there was a Coastal Commission Approval to repair El Nino Storm damage to the pier in the late 90’s. I also know that the main portion of the pier was removed initially followed by the removal of the platform that housed the beach restrooms several years after.  I know that after the pier was removed initially, and with the platform containing the restrooms still there, I kicked something on the bottom in the area of the old pier while riding waves that a friend and fellow wave rider told me was part of the old pier.  Were they mad?  Why did they leave pieces of the pier that could have been dangerous to swimmers and wave riders? Did they not expect big waves to uncover the unfinished job?  A lifeguard told me today that body surfers have been cut up by the remains of this old pier.  I am inclined to believe that this young guard was not old enough to have seen body surfers get cut up by pieces of the old pier but perhaps this happened more recently than I thought.  Having viewed the jagged edges of the pier pilings, one with a significant piece of metal wire hanging from it, it is hard to wrap my mind around why they would not have seen the demolition through to its completion.  The lifeguard informed me that the pier pilings were cut down more by the construction equipment seen on the sand today at Aliso Beach.  So here we are again with another attempt to conceal what should have been taken care of years ago with the pilings cut down a little more and yet not fully removed.  If you are like me, you are scratching your head.  I am hoping to understand the logic behind this recent move to cut down the pilings as well as to open a discussion related to the failure to handle complete removal of the pier the first time around.

Aliso Beach today lost a little more pier.  To the dismay of all people that love Aliso Beach, the job was not completed today.  We are left to wonder when the next storm will beat the shores of Aliso Beach into submission and expose a job that should have been finished a long, long time ago!

Posted in Aliso Beach, Aliso Beach News, South Laguna Beach, South Laguna Beach News Tagged , , , , , |